[分享]如何像這篇寫作得到30分? (5/4有手把手實體公開課教學)
大家好,我是SK2衝刺班的口說顧問Li-Yi.
今天勞動節放假有一點空,想說來分享二月底時的高分範文做為大家參考
跨科代庖拋磚XD
#學術討論寫作30分回憶文
題目約莫是: Should parents give their children allowance?
我的回憶答案如下(稍微修改免得我真實世界的叔叔看到誤會XD)
I agree with Paul's idea that giving children allowance will harm their
relationship with their parents eventually, and I would add that such kind of
funds, especially without any obligation attached to them, will cause
children to lose respect from other later on. For example, my uncle, a
wealthy textile tycoon, gave his three daughters money every month when they
were growing up. Since they didn’t have to do anything to earn the income,
they spent it recklessly on expensive items such as Gucci bags and Rolex
watches, without a sweat. Also, they never wanted to study or work hard at
school or at work, for their wealth could get them anything.
Moreover, they often made fun of those who worked relentlessly, saying that these
folks did not know how to enjoy life. Because of their actions and attitudes,
people hated being around these women and showed much distain when the three
names were brought up in conversations. That’s why I truly believe
that allowance from parents will hurt their young ones' images in the eyes of
others, making
這裡大概是181字.
1.審題想點想細節過程其實跟口說獨立題是一樣。先想到從reputation切入,認為父母不要
隨便給小孩零用錢,例子中間要講到他們不知道付出努力、浪費.差別是我會把口說想到
的2個短句合併為complex sentence (有子句插入句子前中後後+連接詞)/compound
sentence(用對等連接詞或連接副詞接起來)
2.我大約在1分鐘內想好,8分鐘寫.1分鐘檢查
3.寫的時候盡量避免重複字
4.多了一個making在結尾是因為我原本還想要說一下讓他們不受歡迎之類的,
把句型複雜度提升,但狗尾續貂,寫不完XD 所幸沒被扣分
5.其實我以前都寫得比較像口說回答,邏輯對,但並沒有把用字難度、重複度、
句構複雜度考慮進去,自從跟我的寫作同事Rosa和Chris請教好,
一舉30,真的非常感謝他們!
課日期:5/4(六)10:00-12:00
上課地點:捷運大安站11樓中央教室
上課講者:Rosa & Li-Yi顧問
上課內容:衝刺班講座:新制托福寫作+口說關鍵秘密公開課
快速報名連結:https://reurl.cc/g8zAOL
有什麼問題,公開課相見,知無不言!!
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※ 文章網址: https://www.ptt.cc/bbs/TOEFL_iBT/M.1714550798.A.1F6.html
※ 編輯: sonne1419 (101.10.45.234 臺灣), 05/01/2024 16:07:16
※ 編輯: sonne1419 (101.10.45.234 臺灣), 05/01/2024 16:37:00
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